Quiet Time

Nothing is permanent in this world but CHANGE. Who said that?... Anyway, control freak that I am, even if I know this is true, I try to control the major changes that happen in my life. One of which is my recent transfer back to Manila. Much as I love nature tripping in Negros, I thought a change of environment will do me good. So last year, I requested that my job assignment be in Manila again. This will facilitate some plans that I have in the near future. Even if I requested for the change and even if I am used to life in a big city, still, I found myself not so prepared when the change happened. I had everything calculated. But I was called back two weeks earlier than I expected. And my job assignment is in Makati – a city quite different from Manila and Quezon City that used to be my workplace and home respectively. Since the transfer was two weeks earlier, I literally just threw my basic personal things in my luggage on the day of my flight. (I couldn’t pack earlier because I still had a long list of pending things to do.) The not so urgent things, I left behind in boxes to be shipped at a later day.
My first week was filled with daily little mishaps. On my way to find that best route commuting from Taft to Makati, I got lost almost everyday. I don’t know my way around in Makati. It didn’t help that I didn’t take time to study a road map and I just always felt my way through and relied on other people’s directions. This is very much different from my ten minute walk to work in Bacolod or my ten to fifteen minute jeepney ride to my other part-time job in the same city. By the end of the week, I found a term to describe Makati – a huge maze.
I describe my reaction to my new job set-up as a mixture of “in awe” and overwhelmed. Although it’s basically the same job description with supposedly the same standards as my previous workplace, the needs of the people I need to cater to are a lot more demanding. Being new and being aware that my staff is trying to measure me up added to my discomposure. Discoveries and adjustments happened so fast in the first days. There’s just so much organizing and planning and actions that need to be done. As I go home each day, I found myself dead tired. I felt I was a headless chicken running around and just going with the current. By the end of the week, I had enough. My being was clamouring for a quiet time. And quiet time I tried to have on my 2nd Sunday in Manila and the next Sundays onwards.
Thanks to a seminar I attended last summer, I am aware of the wonders of having a quiet time. As the speaker in that seminar said, we need a quiet time to acquaint, know and refine our inner world. To have intimacy with one’s self is necessary to have an authentic human life. In this world where one can have things at a click of a button, we can get used to living a superficial life and, even virtual life, devoid of interactions and intimacies that make us human beings far superior from our “Smart” gadgets.
After trying to strictly have my “quiet time”, I became more patient with myself and hopeful that in the near future, these changes and disorder caused by the changes will fall into place. Below are some questions that can help us live a “quiet time”:
Do I keep work hours to a certain number so that I can have quiet time?
Am I able to focus on my task at hand without interruptions from the use of mobile phone, internet, music, etc.?
Do I reserve quiet time to read literature or humanistic essays?
Do I seek the company of others to feel at ease?
Am I uneasy with just reading without conversing?
Do my conversations revolve around things and people?
Do my conversations remain at the level of just on the surface, what appears to the senses?
Am I at ease being alone to reflect (not alone to do things, such as to surf the web, to work)?
To rest my mind in my free time, do I surf the TV or news, the web, or check facebook and similar sites?

The RH Bill: A Legislation with good-sounding objectives

George W. Bush once said: "It is a sad fact of political life today that bad legislation sometimes becomes law because of politics. No one wants to be the bad guy who vetoes a bill with a good-sounding name... Even worse, this bill not only sounded good, it did have some good as well... The legislation had a great name . How noble. How sound. How difficult to veto."
As Congress debates on the RH Bill these days, our undecided congressmen might also be having the same dilemma as then Texas Governor Bush when he was deciding to veto a legislation on Patient Protection against HMO's.
In our case, who would want to go against a law that will protect and promote the basic right of parents to freely and responsibly plan the number and spacing of their children? Who would want to go against a law that will help lower the incidence of abortion? Who would want to go against a law which want to reduce infant deaths, promote safe motherhood and prevent the spread of the dreaded HIV and AIDS? Who in her right mind want her people to die in poverty?
I am a woman and a nurse by profession. I think womanhood is fascinating. And I take every opportunity to promote the cause of the women. I believe that parents should be responsible in matters that affect their children. And I also believe that we should fight the woes the RH bill wishes to fight. But I am NOT for the passage of the RH Bill and I hope our respected congresswomen and congressmen will NOT make this into a law.
Much as the objectives mean very well for the people, especially the women, its means to achieve the objectives are simply not right - many are even offensive. Yes, there are noble provisions in it, but the offensive parts outweigh the good ones. Although the RH Bill proponents believe that population is the cause of poverty, many studies by note-worthy economists also state that there is no co-relation between population and development. Some even believe that the more young population there is, the more possibilities there will be for progress. Many RH Bill proponents also believe that human life begins at implantation. That is why they do not believe that IUDs and many hormonal contraceptives can cause abortion. But what about many of us who believe that human life begins at fertilization? These above mentioned modern means of family planning render the uterus hostile for implantation - thus human life can be aborted. Our consciences will not allow us from cooperating with evil. This bill will force us to give up our hard earned money through taxes to fund the purchase of these evil means. This is government stifling our right to practice our faith. Mandatory sex-education. Have you read their module? It teaches that religion is an obstacle to one's freedom. Condoms. Thanks to the false security condoms gives, Thailand, where the condom king lives, has now one of the highest incidence of HIV/AIDS in the world. As to maternal health, my direct exposure to the community as a nurse taught me that it’s not the number of children that makes a family healthy. It’s having love, education and work. Do you want to ensure safe pregnancy and delivery? Hire government health workers that do not threaten mothers giving birth that they won't be accommodated again if they get pregnant soon. One poor mother because of the threat, gave birth the following year to her home without medical help. We had to bring her to the hospital...
The bill, for all its good-sounding objectives, would like to change the Filipino culture. With the passage of this bill, we are opening our doors wide to licentiousness and immorality where there is no place for a Provident God. The future generation, those who will be allowed by their parents who are playing God, to be born (because many will not have a chance) will live in a world where values like chastity, fidelity and self-control are unknown. With the passage of this bill, soon we will witness mothers, when their teenage daughters go to parties, instead of saying: “Be careful, dear. Enjoy but behave. Know your limits” We will hear: “Be careful, dear. Enjoy, don’t forget to bring condoms.” (By the way, this line was heard some years back from a mother in New York where the contraceptive mentality is very much alive). This implies that having sex even if you're not married, is okay as long as you don't get pregnant. Will the contraceptives be available for free only for married couples? No. It will be available for everyone. It will be available for children without their parents' knowledge. It will be available to BPO workers who want to have free sex/casual sex after a few drinks. "Safe sex" without love, without commitments... Have you read this line some months ago:"Keep your rosaries away from our ovaries!" Is this Filipino culture? It sounds like coming from Margaret Sanger's world. But I read it here in our country. This bill will encourage this oh so un-Filipino mentality.
I hope our respected congresswomen and congressmen will be brave enough to say No to this bill with good-sounding objectives. I hope you realize that this is bad legislation. We are behind you. We will show our appreciation in the next elections. Please do not exchange our future to pressures from outside, the same people whom they say are ready to pay you 10 million pesos each just to have this bill approved. They will gain back these millions in a short time because the government will be buying millions of modern family planning devices from them.
To close, I'd again like to borrow former US Pres. George W. Bush's words: "You see, the strength of a society should not be measured only in the wealth it accumulates or the technology it develops. The strength of a society should be measured in the values its people share." We're not even sure that this bill will bring in wealth to our people. I know the Philippines is a place where people hold fast to basic values. "People can improve their lives through hard work and education. All must know they have a chance to succeed. It does not happen when they are at the mercy of outside forces; it happens when they realize they have a worth, a dignity, and a free will given by God, not by government. "
"Government cannot solve all our problems. The real answer to improving people’s lives is found in the hearts of decent, caring people who have heard the call to love their neighbours as they would like to be loved themselves. "
"Children must be educated in right from wrong. They must learn to say yes to responsibility, yes to family, yes to honesty and work... And no to drugs, no to violence, no to promiscuity or having babies out of wedlock. "
Our dear congresswomen and congressmen. Please say NO to the RH Bill.

Staying Fit in the Bacolod Heat

When I arrived in Bacolod more than a year ago, one of the things I first noticed is the intense heat, especially during the day. Manila can be hot but the weather here is worse. I sometimes feel like the sun is so enraged that it wishes to burn all that’s under it. While suffering the heat, I was reminded of the time when I joined a group of friends hike towards the Taal crater. On our way to the crater, we observed fumes coming out of the rocks. I just finished reading Dante’s Purgatorio then, and I imagined that’s how it must be like in purgatory. The heat of Bacolod sometimes also feels like you’re in purgatory.
Being a person who loves the cool weather of Baguio and Tagaytay, my initial reaction to the heat was to get cooped in an air-conditioned room most of the time. But it hindered my movements, it affected my mood and it limited my productivity. Fears of dehydration, heat stroke and sunburn also came into my hyperactive mind. I didn’t like it at all. So soon, I decided the heat should not enslave me. I needed to go out to work and I want to live a normal, happy and healthy life.
I know my fears were real. The sun can really burn your skin and can cause the appearance of premature age spots and wrinkles. Heat can make you dehydrated. Dehydration brings discomforts like headache, parched lips, dry and itchy skin, drowsiness and tiredness. Also, we should not to forget, the sweating and the possible smell. Morbid though it seems, but to top it all, I also heard of someone who came here to attend a funeral only to be brought to the emergency room and die of heart attack.
So how am I coping with the Bacolod heat? How do I stay fit and happy and live my life to the full? First, I had to face the fact that we only have a sunny and rainy season here. Either it’s sunny and terribly hot, or it’s uncomfortably raining outside. Nothing in between. With this fact accepted, I have to change my habits a bit. Whenever I go out, I always bring an umbrella. I told myself that using an umbrella isn’t “uncool”. It is rather uncool and foolish to suffer the consequences of the scorching heat of the sun. Since I cannot live without a bag, it was not so hard to make sure that it has in it, my three-fold UV protect umbrella. I also use a 100% UV protect sunglasses. Having astigmatism is bad enough. Migraine due to the sun’s glare is worse. To avoid dehydration, I make sure I drink lots of fluids. At least eight glasses of water per day. So as not to be bored, I also take fresh juices. Bacolod is blessed with a supply of a variety of fruits the whole year. Lastly, to keep life happy, I regularly go out with friends to explore the many refreshing and invigorating sites Negros possesses – waterfalls, mountains, lakes and beaches. I just make sure I have enough water, sunblock and sunglasses and a mood for adventure. 

Loving One’s Body

I love my body! I came to this conclusion again after I was down with acute gastroenteritis two weeks ago. I had to be in bed the whole day and I also experienced fever and chills. I had a difficult time accepting my predicament because first, I seldom get really sick so I don’t know how to play the role of a sick person and second, I’m scheduled to take the first flight to Manila the following day for my much awaited break. Missing my flight was inconceivable.
As I lay on my bed trying to analyze which nutrient my GIT is not able to absorb, I also started asking why this had to happen to me. Soon, it seems that my body started to answer me: “Well, you were not careful. You were not feeling well yesterday yet you didn’t slow down. Worse, you ate a lot during supper. I was telling you to stop but you insisted on finishing the oysters on the table…”
Considerations:
Often times, illness comes because we have not been listening to our body. Even if there’s pain, even if there’s a lump, even if the weighing scale registers an alarming reading, we remain bull headed and we continue with our unhealthy routines. It’s time to listen to our body and show that we also love it.
If ever illness comes, we should welcome it because we can in fact get something good out of our illness. Illness can tell a truth about us – we can get to know our self deeper. We get to realize that we do have limitations. Before my AGE, I never thought my GIT cannot handle a combination of oysters, ginataang tambo (bamboo shoots with coconut milk and corn and okra), chicken inasal (grilled) with sinamak and white chocolate cheesecake. Now, I can here Pacman’s favourite line: “Now, you know.”
Illness is not only bearable but in a way, it is also a completion of a person especially when fully undergone for a purpose. Illness has a place in our life because it gives us time to reflect.
We have to be warned, though, that something in illness is innately introspective. Thus, to be sick is dangerously self-centering. We need to remember that this body can possess us, especially when it is ill. We can be at our worst behaviour. We can also fall into self-pity and depression. Before these negative things happen, we have to keep in mind that illness is not a circumstance, a situation nor a determination of who we are. When we think we are sick, let us try to go out of ourself, think of the others and rise above self-centering. Then, we will see that it can also be a fulfilment of our lives.

Education of Sentiments and Human Integrity

A good friend once sent me a quote from John Knowles' The Paragon: "...I may be only a 'partial person' for the rest of my life... But partial people do the great things in the world, don't they? So many of the scientists, and artists, and innovators did great work to make up for the inner knowledge that they were condemned all their lives to be - incomplete people.
Why be a 'partial person' when we can be complete? Nurses are trained to care for their patients in a holistic way. For us to be quite effective, we need to take care of ourselves in a holistic way too.
Considerations:
Each person is unique. What she is now is a product of her biological make up and learnings from life experiences. Because of this multifactors that make up a person,she has certain tendencies which may be positive or negative that it may lead her closer or farther from self-perfection. To have human integrity means to be able to act/react according to what is appropriate to a given reality. On the long-term, to act in such a way as to lead to the end. Because of one’s unique make up – temperament, character and personality, it may not be easy for a person to react appropriately to any given situation. That is why, she must educate her sentiments to reach a level of maturity/human integrity that she is meant to have.
To achieve human integrity, a person must:
* first know herself. It would be good for her to know and understand her temperament – both her positive and negative tendencies. Once she starts knowing herself, she will realize that she is different from the others. Thus, she could not expect the same reactions when she deals with different people.
* acknowledge her different tendencies so she can start to control emotions/ sentiments that may not be apt for a given situation.
* not stop on self-knowledge. It is not enough. She also needs to think through situations and events that have provoked her to show her emotions. This way, she'll see facts about herself and the others behind these situations and events.

Self-control and self-possession must be practiced constantly. By constant practice of self-control,that is, by exerting efforts to react according to what reality demands despite her opposing tendencies, she will be lead nearer to self-mastery – human integrity.

My Wellness Project

A few years back, as part of my requirement in my Health Promotion subject in graduate school, I started with a wellness project. Of the three health behaviors that I’ve identified, I prioritized physical fitness as my project. Fast forward, I looked into my wellness status again and I still see the same needs.

End of June this year, I had the good fortune of experiencing how it is to have pictorials for a fashion magazine. Since the photo shoot happened in our house, one of my housemates, using our point and shoot digital camera, took a picture of me in one of the dresses we used. I was flabbergasted and worried by the result of the shot. I had gained weight more than necessary! I hurriedly analyzed the situation and refreshed my memory on my project a few years ago. I saw that it is quite important to address this problem because as an instructor of Stress and Illness/Death and Dying where wellness is tackled, I felt the need to be a good example. I need to walk my talk.
So here goes my wellness project for this school year:

Step one: Assessment

Physical Fitness. Keeping myself physically fit has been my last priority. Somebody plans and prepares my food daily so in this aspect, I know I have balanced meals. But with my heavy load as a clinical instructor, I easily drop doing regular aerobics and muscle toning in my schedule. This neglect was reflected in the following:
1. Cardio-respiratory Endurance. I have never been strong in this aspect. I cannot do jumping jacks nor play sack race and I run out of breath whenever I climb flights of stairs. Once in a while my x-ray shows cardiomegaly. Although I was cleared by a cardiologist from any cardiopulmonary ailment, she advised me to strengthen this aspect through cardio exercises.
2. Posture. Because of lack of exercise, my posture also suffered. I often catch myself slouching, with round shoulders and protruding abdomen.
3. Flexibility. I’ve improved in this aspect since my last assessment but I need to at least maintain my flexibility.
4. Muscular Endurance. Assessment showed that I need to strengthen my upper body and abdominal muscles. This is very much important since as a nurse, we sometimes need to lift patients. Strong upper body muscles also mean being able to maintain good posture easily and looking slim.
5. My BMI showed that I am slightly overweight. (Sorry folks, I can’t divulge how much)
Step Two: Planning
A. Behavior change contract
a. The behavior that I will modify in order to produce a higher level of health for me are physical fitness activities that include the following areas:
Cardiorespiratory Endurance
Posture
Flexibility
Muscular Endurance
Diet
b. My plan is to do a 1 hour physical training program at least 3 times a week. The program will be composed of a warm up, aerobic exercises (salsacise or turbo jam), muscle toning exercises, stretching exercises and a cool down. I will alternate the 20-min Turbo Jam plus 40 minute sculpting exercise with an hour of Salsacise and an hour of pilates inspired movements.
c. Support groups: So far, I have several housemates who also love Turbo jam and join me in the work out. I also keep in mind my friends who noticed my weight gain and my students. Lastly, I have Rosemary, Celine and Dianne, my work out instructors in the three videos I’ve mentioned.
d. My greatest reward is to find myself more fit and energetic. I don’t want to ask for more.
e. I will complete this contract and reevaluate it October 15, the last day of our term.
B. Objectives
My main objectives are:
a. Lose at least 8 lbs
b. Trim my waist at least 2 cm
c. Trim my hips at least a cm
d. Be able to perform disc three of my pilates CD with control and balance
e. No rounded shoulders and protruding abdomen in my posture
Step Three: Implementation
My schedule from mid July until the first week of September was nerve wracking. I had work practically almost everyday from Monday to Saturday. I tried to do my exercises with my aimed frequency but there were weeks when I had to cut the length of the work out to 20 minutes or cut the frequency from 3 times to at least once. All throughout, I was conscious of my food intake. It is a great help that many of my students’ care plans and teaching plans were on nutrition. I see MSGs in my favorite junk foods, cholesterol in my porkchop, Bicol express and menudo and sweets in my desserts so it’s easy to cut down on these items. Take note, cut down but not abstain. On the other hand, I see roughage, vitamins and minerals in my vegetables and fruits so I willingly take little more spoonfuls of these despite the fact that some do not ordinarily appeal to my appetite.
Step Four: Evaluation
My behavior regarding physical fitness had a difference before and during the Project. There was increase in motivation to perform physical fitness activities. Even if my schedule did not allow me to do much physical activities, the resolve to go back to what I’ve started is very strong. Even if the demands from school have increased, I was able to keep my cool most of the time. The fitness program made me more alert, active and cheerful. My posture has improved. I have also started to lose weight. For flexibility, balance and muscle control, I am now able to follow CD three of pilates although I still need to be more comfortable with the movements.

On Stress and Illness

My last days of July this year had been very busy. I had a very full load at school and a very important relative came for a visit. I couldn't miss the chance of being with this relative. His very short visit might be his last. I also cannot just give up my load at school because that could create some agitation to several people, considering that we follow a quite complicated schedule.
So, I decided to just run from one place to another during these days. One time I had to wake up very early in the morning to be with my relative then immediate rush to meet my students in some place in Manila for their Related Learning Experience (RLE). Another time, I had to hurry to another end of Metro Manila after school to again be with my relative and the rest of the family. The traffic situation in the city did not help. There were moments when I wished the car I'm in can fly so that I can reach my destination on time. I hate the idea of people waiting for me because I'm late. So, this added to the pressure.
For a while, I was tempted to feel like a victim of circumstance. But I decided to carry on with such a schedule so I can accomplish many things. When school started this year, I resolved to maximize each moment I have because this will be my last term at the university. Looking back at my past five years there, I regretted the moments when I could have planned my schedule better so I can do more things. So I thought I'll give my best shot in this last stretch. Some items in my "bucket list" included:
> I'll perfect the lessons that I've been giving,including the documentation part, e.i., resource units, so my co-concept lecturers and the younger ones can start off where I ended
> I'll help stabilize the INSC Spiritual Committee so the members will be more self-propelled, and the next WESTYV Committee chair can start on other interesting activities, hopefully, more focused on the faculty
> I'll put order on the accounts of the Faculty Club so the next Treasurer can just continue the system. Still on the Faculty Club, that I help make the transfer to our new Faculty room smooth enough and create a homey yet a conducive place for healthy professional and social exchanges between the members.
The list goes on. It sounded simple but it took a toll on my outlook especially at the last days of July when I was faced with more family and social responsibilities.
How did I survive? I applied some tips I usually give to my students for my Stress and Illness lecture:
> Focus on the present. I can't do much about the past nor the future so I might as well give 100% attention to the present.
> Order in my schedule as well as priorities. To focus, I need to know what I need/want to do. By having a "to do" list, I know where to focus my energies.
> Love. Once focused, I can put my entire being, including my mind, heart and will on the present activity . Consequently, I'll enjoy what I'm doing.
But what about the traffic? Cars don't fly. When your car doesn't move because of traffic jam and you're stuck there, grab the chance for a pause. Stretch out and relax your tensed muscles, listen to good music if possible, send the needed SMS to people, and if the pause is long, be more interested in your surroundings. There are so many interesting things/moments that we miss out daily because we are so much in a hurry. These unplanned pauses are our chance to discover more joys and lessons in life.